Relationships

How I Really Feel About Having Another Baby (no I’m not pregnant!)

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Two days before giving birth to Levi!!!

The day after your wedding people begin bombarding you with questions about when you’re going to have a baby. Then, almost immediately after you have said baby, those same folks start asking when you’re going to give him/her a sibling. Basically, people are nosy, or they’re just trying to make conversation. Either way, there’s no avoiding it, and I’d be lying if I said I haven’t been pondering the idea of baby number two since Levi was born. Well, you know, give or take a day or two.

Levi’s turning two next month, and for the record: I’m NOT pregnant. Nor are we trying. Yet. If you’ve been following my motherhood journey, you’re aware the first year of my son’s life was very tough for me. I struggled with postpartum anxiety and depression, as well as insomnia. I adored my baby but I wasn’t in a good place physically or mentally. Once I finally recognized what was going on, I sought treatment and started feeling like myself again. Consequently, year two has been all about enjoying the crazy roller coaster that is motherhood. I’m in a really good place, and the idea of dealing with pregnancy, child birth, and those long, sleepless newborn nights scares me. I’m nervous to rock the boat (bassinet?) so to speak.

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New Mom Challenge: Sleep Deprivation

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Levi at 11 weeks. This boy has stolen my heart… and my sleep. 

Never ask a mom of a newborn if her baby’s sleeping through the night as hearing this question will only remind her how tired she is. And for God’s sake please don’t tell a new mom she looks tired, even if your intention is to acknowledge her plight. The truth is I knew I would be tired the first few months of Levi’s life, I  just didn’t realize all the emotions and challenges that would arise from being in a constant state of sleeplessness.

The first month of Levi’s life he essentially ate every two hours and slept whenever he wasn’t nursing. The constant breastfeeding was tiring and took some getting used to, however, because he was sleeping so much and fell asleep so easily — it was easy for me to nap while he napped. This was crucial for me at this point and I was diligent about it. Of course, it must be said I had hired help cleaning the house a couple times a week and family members bringing us dinner and fetching our groceries. If not I definitely would’ve been more tired. Still, the combination of hormones and a lack of sleep during this first month definitely made me more prone to bouts of crying for seemingly no reason. I would snap at David only to burst into tears and apologize moments later. It wasn’t exactly fun.

Once Levi turned six weeks, a new challenge arose: it became harder to get him down for naps and for nighttime sleep. Suddenly I was way more tired than I had ever been in my life because not only was I  sleeping less overall, but I was exerting more energy trying to get him to sleep. This included endless walks around the neighborhood. Want to know how I lost the baby weight? I literally walked for hours everyday. What’s more, when he wouldn’t go down for hours at a time I would get stressed and anxious which only made it harder for me to fall asleep for naps and at night.

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Motherhood Monday: Levi’s Birth Story and Other Musings From a New Mom

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Levi Alden Lease’s second photo (the first is very bloody). 

Hiiiii,

I cannot believe my baby is six weeks old today! Time definitely flies when you’re busy with a newborn. For those of you who don’t know, our son, Levi Alden Lease was born on November 6 at 3:09 p.m, weighing six pounds and six ounces. I could’ve sworn we were having a girl but I’m so excited to be raising this delicious little man. He’s named for David’s maternal grandmother, Leatrice, and my paternal grandfather Leonid, while his middle name is in honor of David’s maternal grandfather, Albert.

Levi was born via an unplanned C-section because at the last moment the doctors saw he was breech. I pleaded with them to do a vaginal birth (I’ve heard some really bad C-section recovery stories) but they told me because I was 5cm dilated and had already received an epidural — there was no other option. FYI: once the contractions startedthey were so painful I begged for the epidural even though before I went into labour I thought maybe, just maybe I could do without it (I couldn’t).

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Do This With Your Partner Before Baby

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Headed to a wedding at #29weeks

Hola from Orlando. I’m currently 30 weeks pregnant and we’re  in Orlando with our family in an effort to hide from Hurricane Irma. I’m feeling grateful my due date is two months away and praying for the health and safety of my family and friends.

Week 29 marked a turning point in my pregnancy. My heartburn got more fierce, and I started to experience pain in my pelvic region. I described it to my husband as feeling like someone punched me in the crotch and left me all bruised up. TMI? Consequently, I listened to my body and stopped going to my beloved dance cardio classes because it’s too much jumping and too high intensity for me to handle right now. Last week even prenatal yoga felt like too much, however, this week I was able to handle a barre class and I’ve started swimming which I should’ve done a long time ago because it’s so wonderful while pregnant.

In other news, we attended a birthing/parenting class at our synagogue which included an hour long session entitled: from partners to parents. An amazing clinical social worker by the name of Amy Small talked to us about the inevitable transition we’d be experiencing and I thought one exercise was particularly helpful. She had the spouses sit across from one another and instructed us to take turns telling our significant other the things we expect from them as a parent. Each person got three minutes to speak (no interruptions allowed), and when they were finished the other person had to repeat everything back to them and ask if they’d missed anything.

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Babies on the brain? Read this

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My nieces and nephew four years ago.

Happy New Year dear readers! As I’ve said before, my life is essentially an open “blog” because I find the act of sharing to be quite therapeutic. So here goes: I’ve got babies on the brain. Perhaps it’s because I’m surrounded by the most adorable little ones (thank you friends), or because my clock has started to tick (thank you mother nature), or because my husband is so freakin’ amazing around little kids that it fills my heart with glee (thank you husband).

It’s probably a combination of all the above, plus the fact I’ve always loved babies and have wanted to have children since before I even knew where they came from. You know those people that stop to ooh and aah at every puppy they come across? Well, that’s me except with babies. Once they hit five I start to lose interest (unless they’re related to me like my nieces and nephew, and obviously if they’re mine, or at least I hope so). All this to say that I’m praying 2017 will be the year I get pregnant. Holy sh*t — just writing this makes me extremely happy and terrified all at once. #overwhelmed. Continue reading →

I had a Second Wedding and it was the Best Decision

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Our celebrity moment walking into a room filled with our family and friends. Photo by Jeffrey de Belle photography.

There are so many reasons not to have a wedding. Weddings tend to bring up otherwise dormant family issues, and they’re ridiculously expensive, not to mention time consuming and stressful. So then why did I disregard all the naysayers, including my very own husband, and willingly choose to have a second wedding?

To understand my decision, allow me to explain the circumstances surrounding my first wedding. It was an eight-person affair that took place at sunset, on the beach in Miami, where we live. I wore a knee-length Elizabeth and James white dress sans shoes, while my fiancé sported khakis and a linen button-down. I carried a pretty bouquet and we said “I do” in front of a notary and our close relatives. It was magical and beautiful, but it wasn’t how I pictured my wedding day.

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